Ent wakes up and finds he is strong

A group of Halloween freaks took Newport by storm this Saturday. Lets take a look.

Khem, Amanda and Beca as a fabulous glittering threesome.

I stood in as the ent "Treebeard", a bulky, imposing tree-hearder covered entirely with real mosses, lichens, mushrooms, branches, and bark. The lavish costume's massive false head also featured two painted ping-pong balls as haunting orange eyeballs. We started the evening with the throng at the Oregon Coast Aquarium's "Creatures of the Night." The Ent left the event with a lovely gift basket as a first-place prize.

The very heavy, woody ent costume required a nerd, a copweb and a street walker as full-time support staff. One important function was to pick up pieces of me as the mob of touchy-feely revelers stroked my mosses, lichens and other parts.

Treebeard and the Golden Eagle tied for first place at the Rogue Brewery's costume contest. Both costumes were very engaging but the Eagle garnered louder and luder applause due to her vastly greater sex appeal.

Earl and Pearl, retirees from arid Arizona, had never seen such excessive mossy growth.

By the end of the night I had lost large quantities of mossy debris, several fingers, a mushroom, auxillary branches and my pants. The weighty trousers migrated downward thoughout the evening. I'll be regrowing parts before the Ent appears again later in the week.

The Truimph and Tragedy of Super Fred Meyer

Khem So, mild-mannered civil servant, made a sudden transformation into SUPER FRED MEYER this Friday. The heroic patron of One-Stop-Shopping fearlessly defended Fred Meyer stores across the Northwest until he ripped his crotch. The hero then re-appeared in my living room as a man in plastic shopping bags and a Mexican fighting mask. We continued our preparations for Saturday’s Halloween Festivities.